A 65-year-old lady suddenly started learning to swim instead of her usual routine of going to bingo. Everyone was curious and asked her, “Why the change in your interest in swimming nowadays?” The lady replied with a helpless look, “Whenever my son and daughter-in-law are arguing, my daughter-in-law always asks my son,” If your mom … Read more
A blonde driving a car got lost in a snowstorm. She didn’t panic, however, as she remembered what her father had told her once. “If you ever get stuck in a snowstorm, just wait for a snowplow to come by and follow it.” Sure enough, a snowplow arrived and she started to follow it. She … Read more
A blonde wanted a fancy way of spending her weekend and decided a weekend spent on a farm in another state was the best idea. On getting to the farm, she saw something that caught her attention. She saw a cow without horns and found it fascinating. Confused, she asked the farmer standing next to … Read more
A man walks into a bar and quickly orders 12 of the most expensive whiskey shots. The bartender lines 12 up shot glasses and fills them up. The man quickly downs all 12 of them back to back and taps the bar, “again.” The bartender looks a little surprised but lines up 12 more shots. … Read more
A woman called the Colorado State Division of Wildlife regarding a snake in her backyard. “Can you tell me what kind it is?” she asked. “Can you describe it?” I asked. “Yes,” she said. “It’s long and thin.” Wife was trying to train a dog. Husband: You will never succeed in making that dog obey … Read more
When a father asked his little boy what he wanted for Christmas. The boy replied. “A baby sister.” As it turned out, the wife was pregnant and delivered on Christmas Eve. On Christmas Day she brought home a brand new baby sister for their son. The next year, when the father asked his little boy … Read more
A boy was assigned a paper on childbirth and asked his parents, “How was I born?” ‘Well, honey…’ said the slightly prudish parent, “An Angel brought you to us.” “Oh,” said the boy. “Well, how did you and daddy get born?” he asked. “Oh, the angel brought us too.” “Well how were grandpa and grandma … Read more
Two elderly women were out driving in a large car. Both could barely see over the dashboard. As they were cruising along they came to an intersection. The stoplight was red but they just went on through. The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself “I must be losing it, I could have sworn … Read more
An old farmer wins the ten million dollar lottery and is being interviewed. The reporter asked what he is going to do with all the money. “Oh, I reckon the first thing do is go and pay a few bills.” “And what about the rest?” the reporter continued. The farmer shrugs. “Well, I guess they’ll … Read more
A Texan farmer is on vacation in Australia. There he meets an Australian farmer and talks. The Australian shows off his large wheat field and the Texan says, “Oh! We have wheat fields that are at least twice as large”. Then they walk around the ranch for a bit and the Australian shows off his … Read more