A little boy boy comes back from school, disappointed, because he got a 0 on a geography exam. “The teacher gave me a zero because I couldn’t answer a question on Portugal,” he said. His mother asked, “What was the question?” “Where’s Portugal.” “The idiot teacher, I’m going to call the principal’s office. In the … Read more
The wife checked her husband’s phone and found these names: ‘The tender one’ ‘The amazing one’ ‘Lady of my dreams, She got angry and called the first number to find out that was his mother. Then she called the second number to which his sister replied. When she dialed the third number her own phone … Read more
Sixth-grade science teacher Mrs. Samson asks her class, “Who can tell me which organ of the human body expands to ten times its normal size when stimulated?” No one raises their hand, so she calls on the first student to look her way. “Mary, can you tell me which organ of the human body expands … Read more
Four students were out partying late at night and didn’t study for the test which was scheduled for the next day. In the morning, they thought of a plan to lie to the Dean. They got dirty with grease and dirt. Then they went up to the Dean and said that they had gone out … Read more
The old lady is in the supermarket and starts throwing the frozen veggies on the floor, so the manager asks if he can help. “I’m looking for Broccoli.” He informs her that they are out of stock, and she leaves. An hour later she is back throwing the frozen veggies onto the floor, the irate … Read more
Morris, an 82-year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young lady on his arm. A couple of days later, the doctor spoke to Morris and said, “You’re really doing great, aren’t you?” Morris replied, “Just doing what … Read more
A city fisherman was out fishing in a small boat on a lake. He noticed another man in a small boat open his tackle box and take out a mirror. The man rowed over curiously and asked, “What is the mirror for?” “That’s my secret way of catching fish,” said the other man. “Shine the … Read more
An elementary school class goes on a field trip to the police station. The Officer points to the 10 MOST WANTED list and tells them that these are the most wanted fugitives in the USA. Little Boy says ” He is the MOST WANTED in the USA?!” Officer says “Yes.” Little Boy asks “Why didn’t … Read more
A guy asks a barman how much a coke is. The barman says it’s $5 but asks for $10. So the guy’s confused and asks why, to which the barman answers: “$5 for the coke, $5 for the service.” The guy pays up but the barman gives him $5 back. So the guy’s confused and … Read more
An old woman is riding in an elevator in a very lavish New York City Building. When a young and beautiful woman walks into the elevator, smelling of expensive perfume. She turns to the old woman and says arrogantly: “Ralph Lauren’s “Romance”, $150 an ounce! ” Then another young and beautiful woman gets on the … Read more