An atheist was walking through the woods. “What majestic trees! What powerful rivers! What beautiful animals!” he said to himself. As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him. He ran as fast as he … Read more
Dolly wanted a new living room set but her husband kept saying. “No.” Every day she would ask him to please let her have the set. Every day he would say. “No.” One day he decided to end this discussion once and for all. When Dolly asked, he looked at her and said. “You can … Read more
Do we ever take the time to ponder over the thought that what goes around, comes around? Very often, we undertake certain actions without being completely aware of the impact they have on other people. Luckily, life finds a way to remind us that we should be a bit more considerate. After the passing of … Read more
A farmer buys a young rooster. As soon as he gets it home, the rooster fucks all the farmer’s 150 hens. The farmer is impressed. At lunch, the rooster screws all 150 hens again. The next day, the rooster fucks the ducks and the geese. Sadly, later that day, the farmer finds the rooster laying … Read more
Ted and his wife were working in their garden one day when Ted looks over at his wife and says: “Your b*tt is getting really big, I mean really big! I bet your butt is bigger than the barbecue. ” With that, he proceeded to get a measuring tape and measure the grill and then … Read more
I walked out on my porch this morning to the wonderful sight of the sun rising over the mountains. I smiled as its golden beams lit up the clear, blue sky. My light jacket was unbuttoned, and the morning breeze felt warm and comforting. The trees were still bare of any buds, but I could … Read more
Papa Bear and Mama Bear are getting a divorce You know Goldilocks and the 3 bears? Well mama bear and papa bear are getting a divorce. In court they bring in baby bear. The judge puts baby bear on the stand and asks him who he’d like to live with? “Well not papa bear he … Read more
Smoked Chicken Wings Ingredients: 2 pounds chicken wings 1 tablespoon paprika 1 tablespoon garlic powder 1 tablespoon onion powder 1 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon pepper 1/2 cup unsalted butter, melted 1/4 cup hot sauce Instructions: Preheat your grill for indirect heat. You will need to set up a cooler side and a hotter side. In … Read more
His wife inquires as to how he got the black eyes. The man goes on to say, “a lady stood up in front of me during mass, I saw her dress was stuck in the butt crack, so I reached out and tugged it out. She whirled around, became furious, and punched me in the … Read more
The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged us to get to know someone we didn’t already know. I stood up to look around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder. I turned round to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me with a smile that lit up her … Read more