{"id":28474,"date":"2024-01-25T22:30:30","date_gmt":"2024-01-25T22:30:30","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/?p=28474"},"modified":"2024-01-25T22:30:30","modified_gmt":"2024-01-25T22:30:30","slug":"best-divorce-letter-ever","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/?p=28474","title":{"rendered":"Best Divorce Letter Ever"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"63d509947b33dea96ed9a09b2482b63d\" data-index=\"1\" style=\"float: none; margin:10px 0 10px 0; text-align:center;\">\n<div data-type=\"_mgwidget\" data-widget-id=\"1554417\">\r\n<\/div>\r\n<script>(function(w,q){w[q]=w[q]||[];w[q].push([\"_mgc.load\"])})(window,\"_mgq\");\r\n<\/script>\r\n\n<\/div>\n<h2><strong>Dear Wife,<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>I am writing this letter to let you know that I am leaving you forever.<\/p>\n<p>In our seven years of marriage, the truth is that I have been a good husband to you and I have absolutely nothing from that.<\/p>\n<p>These last couple of weeks have been really hard for me.<\/p>\n<p>Your boss told me that you left your job just today and that, well that was the final straw.<\/p>\n<p>Two weeks ago, when you came home after work, you did not even notice that I had cooked your favorite dish, I had a brand new haircut or a new pair of boxers.<\/p>\n<p>You just ate for a couple of minutes, watched all of your soaps, and went straight to bed.<\/p>\n<p>The truth is that you don\u2019t care about me, you don\u2019t tell me you love me anymore, and you don\u2019t touch me or anything.<\/p>\n<p>Either you do not love me anymore, or you\u2019re cheating on me, no matter in which case, I have to say it\u2019s over and I\u2019m leaving.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Your Ex-husband<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>P.S. Please, do not try to find me. Your sister Carla and I are moving to West Virginia together! Wish you the best and I hope you have a great life!<\/strong><\/p>\n<h2><strong>Dear Ex-Husband,<\/strong><\/h2>\n<p>Believe me one thing. Getting your letter made my day perfect.<\/p>\n<p>Yes, we have been married for seven years, but a good husband is completely different from what you have been.<\/p>\n<p>Yes, I watch TV shows, but I do it because the soaps drown out your nonstop griping and whining, but this doesn\u2019t seem to work.<\/p>\n<p>And yes, I noticed your brand new haircut, but the first thing I thought was that you look like a girl.<\/p>\n<p>And you know I was raised not to say anything in case I cannot say something nice.<\/p>\n<p>That\u2019s why I decided not to speak about it or comment on your haircut.<\/p>\n<p>When you made my favorite dish, you must have gotten me mixed with my lovely sister, since I stopped consuming pork seven years ago.<\/p>\n<p>When it comes to your new boxers, I didn\u2019t comment since you still had the $49.80 price tag on them and I hoped that it was a coincidence that my lovely sister Carla had borrowed $50 from me the same day.<\/p>\n<p>But even after all, I still cared about you and I loved you, and I believed that we might make this work.<\/p>\n<p>So, when I got a lotto for 15 million dollars, what I did was quit my job and buy us two tickets to Hawaii.<\/p>\n<p>But, by the time I got home, you were already gone. I guess there is a reason for everything.<\/p>\n<p>I genuinely hope that you will have the life you always desired.<\/p>\n<p>Moreover, according to my lawyer, the letter you sent me ensures that you won\u2019t get a dime from what I have now.<\/p>\n<p>So, there is nothing more to say but take care.<\/p>\n<p><strong>Your Ex-Wife \u2013 Free, and Rich<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>P.S. I believe I haven\u2019t told you this, but my lovely sister Carla was born as Carl. I hope that is no issue for you.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n<div style=\"font-size: 0px; height: 0px; line-height: 0px; margin: 0; padding: 0; clear: both;\"><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dear Wife, I am writing this letter to let you know that I am leaving you forever. In our seven years of marriage, the truth is that I have been a good husband to you and I have absolutely nothing from that. These last couple of weeks have been really hard for me. Your boss &#8230; <a title=\"Best Divorce Letter Ever\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/?p=28474\" aria-label=\"Read more about Best Divorce Letter Ever\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":12,"featured_media":28475,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-28474","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28474","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/12"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=28474"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28474\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":28476,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/28474\/revisions\/28476"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/28475"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=28474"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=28474"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=28474"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}