{"id":27951,"date":"2023-12-03T16:22:16","date_gmt":"2023-12-03T16:22:16","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/?p=27951"},"modified":"2023-12-03T16:22:16","modified_gmt":"2023-12-03T16:22:16","slug":"a-man-returns-home-early-from-work-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/?p=27951","title":{"rendered":"A man returns home early from work"},"content":{"rendered":"<div class=\"63d509947b33dea96ed9a09b2482b63d\" data-index=\"1\" style=\"float: none; margin:10px 0 10px 0; text-align:center;\">\n<div data-type=\"_mgwidget\" data-widget-id=\"1554417\">\r\n<\/div>\r\n<script>(function(w,q){w[q]=w[q]||[];w[q].push([\"_mgc.load\"])})(window,\"_mgq\");\r\n<\/script>\r\n\n<\/div>\n<p>A man returns home early from work one afternoon to find his wife spread out on the bed, puffing and panting.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cWhat are you doing?\u201d the man inquires. \u201cErr,\u201d she stammers back.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cI\u2026 um\u2026 I think I\u2019m having a heart attack!\u201d \u201cOh,\u201d cries the gullible husband, \u201cquick, I\u2019ll call an ambulance!\u201d<\/p>\n<p>He runs downstairs, picks up the phone and begins dialing 911, when his son Johnny appears, sobbing his little heart out. \u201cWhat\u2019s the matter, son?\u201d asks the father.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cUncle James is in the closet with no clothes on, Daddy,\u201d replies his tearful toddler.<\/p>\n<p>Enraged, the man runs back upstairs, flings open the wardrobe and finds his brother there absolutely , just as his son had said.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cYou , Jim,\u201d screams the man.<\/p>\n<p>\u201cMy wife is over there having a heart attack and you\u2019re running around scaring Johnny!\u201d<\/p>\n\n<div style=\"font-size: 0px; height: 0px; line-height: 0px; margin: 0; padding: 0; clear: both;\"><\/div>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>A man returns home early from work one afternoon to find his wife spread out on the bed, puffing and panting. \u201cWhat are you doing?\u201d the man inquires. \u201cErr,\u201d she stammers back. \u201cI\u2026 um\u2026 I think I\u2019m having a heart attack!\u201d \u201cOh,\u201d cries the gullible husband, \u201cquick, I\u2019ll call an ambulance!\u201d He runs downstairs, picks &#8230; <a title=\"A man returns home early from work\" class=\"read-more\" href=\"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/?p=27951\" aria-label=\"Read more about A man returns home early from work\">Read more<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":12,"featured_media":27952,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-27951","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"aioseo_notices":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27951","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/12"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=27951"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27951\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":27953,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/27951\/revisions\/27953"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/27952"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=27951"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=27951"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/mrhealthyalternative.com\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=27951"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}